Thoughts for Thursday....just when I thought I had lots of ideas to pull from, I draw a blank! Thoughts for Thursday is tough when I can't think straight! Ever feel like your mind is just jumbled? It's full of what if's and unknown answers to questions spinning around in your head. We worry. We stress. We think we are having a bad day, then it gets worse.
Don't worry, I am not having a nervous breakdown or anything. It's just the only thing consistent in life is change, and today is just one of "those days". So I googled solutions for when your mind is jumbled, and this is what came up. Interesting. I have never really done anything they talk about here to help clear my mind. I mean usually when I hear the word meditation, I just feel like you just sit and breathe and waste time when you could be doing something more productive. Hmmm. I have a feeling I am wrong on that.
Anyways, I promise this blog won't just turn into a "video sharing" blog. Although today I am going to share this because I can't think of what else to do. Check it out if you get where I'm coming from...or if you are having one of "those days" yourself......
TGIF tomorrow!
http://www.videojug.com/film/how-to-clear-your-mind
Showing posts with label Thursdays. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Thursdays. Show all posts
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Thoughts for Thursday
Well, I decided to start my blog back up during this past summer. I have somewhat surprised myself that I have actually stuck to it. This is my 11th week to be "daily". I know I have heard from some friends who seem to enjoy reading it. I figure I might also be getting on some people's nerves. Haha! There's Tasha, with her blog...again.
If you haven't already hidden me from your feed, I figured maybe I'd try switching it up a bit next week. I do have a "Daily Cup of T" facebook page. I thought I'd try strictly posting from that next week to kind of separate my blog from my personal page.
So if you like reading my posts, please like my "Daily Cup of T" facebook page to keep on reading. Thanks everyone!
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Thoughts for Thursday
Deep thoughts, random thoughts...just some thoughts for Thursday.
How many times do you take the same route during the day, and notice something new? On a drive the other day with my daughter in the back seat, she pointed out something new to me. We were at a busy intersection at a red light. There were cars and people everywhere, and Blake says "Look at the birds!" I had to look all around to notice a TON of birds sitting on top of the gas station's roof across the street. Now I see that birds are there all the time.
I love when she'll notice different details that as an adult I would just look right by. This is only one of a lot of examples. It's always interesting to see through her eyes. It also can make boring things fun. She loves trains. My normal response would not be excitement to get stuck at the train tracks waiting for one to pass by, but now I actually hope one stops us. I have even passed up the tracks and then taken a U-turn if we just miss getting stopped by one. The look on her face makes it all worth it. It also makes the routine drive a little better each time. I never know what she will find joy in next, what is "down the tracks", and I absolutely love that.
I love when she'll notice different details that as an adult I would just look right by. This is only one of a lot of examples. It's always interesting to see through her eyes. It also can make boring things fun. She loves trains. My normal response would not be excitement to get stuck at the train tracks waiting for one to pass by, but now I actually hope one stops us. I have even passed up the tracks and then taken a U-turn if we just miss getting stopped by one. The look on her face makes it all worth it. It also makes the routine drive a little better each time. I never know what she will find joy in next, what is "down the tracks", and I absolutely love that.
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Thoughts for Thursday
Deep thoughts, random thoughts...just some thoughts for Thursday.
Why is it kids can want to do what we dread, and don't want to do what we long for?
Some examples:
Why is it kids can want to do what we dread, and don't want to do what we long for?
Some examples:
- Blake thinks it is super cool to load the dishwasher. I think "time to unload, reload...again".
- Blake does not want to take a nap. She can fight it until she eventually caves. I could be out in less than 3 minutes any given time of the day whether I've had coffee or not.
- Blake watches me in wonder when I wash my face. She looks at me and smiles saying "Whatchu doing mommy? You washing your face?" While of course we do bathe our child, it's not like she stands at the sink to wash her face. I have to force myself sometimes to do this simple task simply because I may not feel like it. I have let her crawl up to our sink before, and believe me, she would wash her face all day long if I'd let her.
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Thoughts for Thursday
Deep thoughts, random thoughts...just some thoughts for Thursday.
The Power of a Compliment.
Just something to give some thought to today...do you give out compliments? I often will think something really nice of someone, and not always verbalize it. It might be that they look nice, or that they said something that stuck with me, or that they possess a quality that I really admire. Don't get me wrong...I do compliment people, but I can often just let that thought slip right by if I'm caught up in a conversation.
I really tend to remember compliments when I receive them though. Maybe because they can often catch me off guard. I remember some really random ones from people I might not even keep in touch with anymore, or perhaps even from a customer back when I was in the "working" world. I won't list all the ones that come to mind, but they are with me and randomly come back when I might be having a negative thought about myself or for no real reason at all.
Next time you think something complimentary of someone, try to remember to speak up and let that person know. I really believe it will stick with them. Everyone has something good about them and they should know it. I know it sounds a little Stuart Smalley, but gosh darn it, we should build each other up. ;)
Just something to give some thought to today...do you give out compliments? I often will think something really nice of someone, and not always verbalize it. It might be that they look nice, or that they said something that stuck with me, or that they possess a quality that I really admire. Don't get me wrong...I do compliment people, but I can often just let that thought slip right by if I'm caught up in a conversation.
I really tend to remember compliments when I receive them though. Maybe because they can often catch me off guard. I remember some really random ones from people I might not even keep in touch with anymore, or perhaps even from a customer back when I was in the "working" world. I won't list all the ones that come to mind, but they are with me and randomly come back when I might be having a negative thought about myself or for no real reason at all.
Next time you think something complimentary of someone, try to remember to speak up and let that person know. I really believe it will stick with them. Everyone has something good about them and they should know it. I know it sounds a little Stuart Smalley, but gosh darn it, we should build each other up. ;)
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Thoughts for Thursday
Dinner of grilled chicken and roasted vegetables = Good
1 hour Zumba class = Good
Bowl of Breyer's Blast Waffle Cone Ice Cream (our fave) = NTB
Breakfast of pancakes = NTB
Morning jog = Good
Can of Chicken Vegetable Soup for lunch = ?
That last one had me stumped. I think soup is generally good for you. Chicken and vegetables are good for you. Although I know most canned items are high in sodium. How bad is too much salt? Does it really matter? So during lunch I googled this mystery on my phone. I was also in search of the healthiest of canned soups. The soup I had today is the one pictured in the middle. According to http://www.sparkpeople.com, my soup did well on their 4 criteria for a healthy soup. Although mine was 1 gram short on fiber. They suggested a soup 250 calories or less, 3 grams of fat or less, 3 grams of fiber or more, and less than 600mg of sodium.
Looking further I found on http://www.marksdailyapple.com the answer to my question on salt. Besides fluid retention, salt directly impacts blood pressure. It also is linked to osteoporosis, asthma, kidney disease and stomach cancer. The worst culprit in most soups though is MSG. Not good stuff. It can cause headaches, chest pain, rapid heartbeat and drowsiness.
Anyways, thankfully I could keep eating because my soup did not have high sodium or MSG. However, my soup was not organic... so surely I downed some pesticides... which grosses me out. People tend to think buying organic is froo-froo, but it is actually just smart. Although, yes it is a little more expensive and sometimes harder to find. And yes, our generation did not grow up eating all organic, but the food market is changing. Why choose pesticides and hormones over organic if given the option? As I once heard on Oprah, pay more now or pay more at the doc's later in life. I am getting off on a tangent though and I am no expert in this field. So anyways, I did have some organic soup on hand. After comparing labels, I found my organic soups were higher in sodium. Where is the balance?
Enter http://www.livestrong.com. They did the research and claim the healthiest soup choice is Amy's Kitchen Lentil Vegetable Soup Light in Sodium. Organic, free of artificial additives and MSG, and lowest in sodium. It also provides more nutrients than other soups: 7g protein, 8g fiber, 45%RDA of vitamin A, and 20%RDA of vitamin C.
So I am now on the lookout for this soup! There you have it folks. Some thoughts on soup for Thursday. Homemade soup is probably the way to go, but cooking multiple meals a day is another thought for another Thursday. That's all from this soup nerd. Have a great Thursday!:)
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Thoughts for Thursdays
Deep thoughts, random thoughts...just some thoughts for Thursday.
A thought I am having for today is that I need to slow down. Not necessarily in a fast paced lifestyle kind of thing, but literally. This mama needs to slow down....while driving. I went 16 years without a single speeding ticket. Then I got two in the same year. Ouch! Not fun. So today's post is somewhat short because I have to go over to the courthouse with all the other criminals and take care of it. Blah. To go along with today's driving theme I found some interesting facts for more food for thought.....
According to eHow.com:
The Early Days
The first speeding tickets were given out in 1902, when the top speed of most cars was around 45 miles per hour.
Despite the harm some cars do to the environment, the automobile is actually the most recycled product in the world.
Okay, off to the courthouse I go...slowly. Have a great day everyone!
According to eHow.com:
The Early Days
The first speeding tickets were given out in 1902, when the top speed of most cars was around 45 miles per hour.
- Some of the first cars ever made used a pair of levers to steer. Steering wheels weren't introduced for several years.Even before the Model T, the first popular American car was the Curved Dash Oldsmobile, which sold new for $650.The first car ever produced in America for sale was known as the Duryea. Only one model is known to still exist.Before the 1920s, cars didn't have gas gauges. Drivers had to estimate how much fuel was left, or risk running out.
For Drivers
Cleveland was the first city in the United States to get a traffic light in 1914.
- In 1972 the average speed of cars on Los Angeles freeways was 60 miles per hour. Ten years later, the growing traffic problem dropped that number to 17 miles per hour.The average American will spend two weeks of her life stopped at red lights.To drive on all of the paved roads in the United States, you would have to drive nonstop at 100 miles per hour for over four years.The first car insurance policy was issued in Westfield, Massachusetts, in 1897.
Despite the harm some cars do to the environment, the automobile is actually the most recycled product in the world.
- The first Grand Prix race took place in 1901. Drivers averaged less than 50 miles per hour.One out of every seven cars sold in the United States is sold in Southern California.The average car contains over 3,000 feet of electrical wires.Most car horns have perfect pitch, playing in the note of F.Cell phone maker Motorola got its start producing record players for cars. The company's name comes from a combination of "motor" and "Victrola."
Okay, off to the courthouse I go...slowly. Have a great day everyone!
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Thoughts for Thursday
Anyways, I also recently came across this little newspaper clipping of something I wrote in sixth grade. It was a class assignment to be a newspaper reporter. My write-up was covering a sixth grader who won the lottery and what this sixth grader did with it. It struck me as super funny because I actually was very studious when I was younger, and all I write about is the winner getting out of homework, etc. Just for fun, here is what I wrote....
Sixth-Grader Wins Lottery
Today, a sixth-grade student won the lottery and bought Baldwin School. Many changes have been made. Limousines are now taking the kids to school instead of buses. Soda will now come out of the drinking fountains. Roller skating is permitted in the gym. The No. 1 rule is "No more homework!" There will now be only four hours of school. Fifteen minutes of school will be spent as study time and the other three hours and forty-five minutes will be recess, parties or other fun activities. This new owner does not want to reveal his name, but whoever he is - he has style!
Haha! Well, for obvious reasons this may crack me up more than you. However, I still think it is fun to see how a kid's mind works. I am looking forward to seeing what all my daughter's future assignments and creativity will bring. For now, I just have to remember to go redeem my free ticket. Maybe I'll hit it big and go for a limo ride...to the roller rink...while sipping soda along the way!;)
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Thoughts for Thursday
So for last week's Thoughts for Thursday I had kind of a Ms. Positive thing going on. It was a little on the "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff" side. Well, since then I had a couple of really crappy days! Nothing major...just a nothing-going-right/bad-mood kind of thing. I was annoyed with myself that I could write about making the most out of life, and then feel so completely opposite. What a hypocrite, huh?!
Well, today is a new day. It's not all rainbows and lollipops, but I have pulled myself out of a slump. I won't go into all the details, but mainly I was just having a lot of mom guilt. It's hard keeping up with everything and a toddler. Some new discipline things have popped up with our little one. Nothing major, just pushing at playgroups, but it's been making me feel down. I know she's two, it's a kid thing, probably a phase, but it's frustrating! I'm finding these toddler years are fun and frustrating! It's a little, or a lot, of both I guess. Cute they are talking more and all, but it's also a feeling of "so not only do I have to keep you alive and teach you what to do, but I also have to teach you what NOT to do?" Ha! Just kidding. I know it goes along with being a parent, but man, this job never gets a day off! Well, I got a new game plan. I'm going to try to stop feeling all crappy about it and just do something else about it. What I have been trying has not worked, so duh, I'm going to try something else.
Here are a couple of posters that I have seen recently on Pinterest that relate to what I'm talking about. It's just absolute common sense, but a nice reminder when I am feeling overwhelmed.
Well, today is a new day. It's not all rainbows and lollipops, but I have pulled myself out of a slump. I won't go into all the details, but mainly I was just having a lot of mom guilt. It's hard keeping up with everything and a toddler. Some new discipline things have popped up with our little one. Nothing major, just pushing at playgroups, but it's been making me feel down. I know she's two, it's a kid thing, probably a phase, but it's frustrating! I'm finding these toddler years are fun and frustrating! It's a little, or a lot, of both I guess. Cute they are talking more and all, but it's also a feeling of "so not only do I have to keep you alive and teach you what to do, but I also have to teach you what NOT to do?" Ha! Just kidding. I know it goes along with being a parent, but man, this job never gets a day off! Well, I got a new game plan. I'm going to try to stop feeling all crappy about it and just do something else about it. What I have been trying has not worked, so duh, I'm going to try something else.
Here are a couple of posters that I have seen recently on Pinterest that relate to what I'm talking about. It's just absolute common sense, but a nice reminder when I am feeling overwhelmed.
 |
| Duh. |
 |
| If only we could just have this attitude everyday. |
So that last one reminds me of a quote I hear or see every now and then....
"When I get sad,
I stop being sad
and
be awesome instead.
True story."
I looked up the author on this one. Apparently, it is from the show How I Met Your Mother. The character Barney Stinson has it on a poster in his office. I haven't really watched this show, but maybe I should start. I heard it's funny and that quote has caught my eye. Well, turning this week around now. Here's to hoping it gets a little more on the awesome side!;)
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Thoughts for Thursday
Deep thoughts, random thoughts...just some thoughts for Thursday.
September is here! I don't know about you, but I'm looking forward to Fall! I know it is not technically here yet, but sometimes just a flip of the calendar gives me the feeling of a fresh new start. Does it feel any different for you or not really? We all mark certain times of the year as a starting off point, don't we? New Year's day, our birthday, school years, different seasons, different months....they're all just days on the calendar really, but some feel more significant than others.
Well, I was just thinking this morning about how everything lately seems to be going well for us. I was out on a jog with my daughter in her stroller. It felt different because it was cooler and the change felt nice. We are on an up swing, you could say. Life is all about change. Good days, bad days, good moods, bad moods. How often we have the power to make life whatever we want, but we can just get stuck in a rut. I can be such a homebody at times, but when I start to feel blah, it's good to shake things up. My daughter and I just started a new weekly Community Bible Study, which I think is going to be good for us both. I took a two hour long Zumba class last night. I haven't taken a dance class like that since I was in college. I didn't feel guilty it was during dinner time either because of the new set-up I have with my friend. Our new weekly dinner swap had dinner taken care of. My husband got extra time for a daddy/daughter dinner, and mommy got time to go do my own thing. We have family coming to visit this weekend. I do not want to jinx myself, but all is well right now.
I also got to thinking how a couple months ago when I was lying in a hospital bed...I just wanted to have the freedom to go and do these things. We can all take so much for granted until we don't have the option to do so. I realize life isn't always completely a go-make-it-what-you-want-it scenario. Obviously, some things we cannot change. We may be sick in a hospital bed, have family members sick, have sad situations, or financial troubles. We may be in a stage where we are not getting enough sleep from any of the frustrating things I just mentioned, or even from something good like the blessing of a baby or young child. They too can rob us of our sleep and zap our energy.
I get a little lost in my thoughts here because I am reflecting more upon my own life, and not directing this at anyone in particular who may read this. I don't mean to sound like I'm giving a sermon or something. We all go through certain stages and problems. It's just life can really swing back and forth. I know when I was in that hospital bed I almost felt as though everyone should have a picture of what I was looking at somewhere framed in their house. Just to give perspective. I have it mentally in my mind. If you are in a stage where you can't change certain things, I hope you find the strength to get through them and remain as positive as possible. When you get through that difficult time, you will be able to enjoy things so much more, so please hang on to that thought. And if all you need for a good change...is a change of perspective or attitude, or a new routine, then by all means...do that for yourself. Life is too short.
Man, deep thoughts again today. Hope I'm not bringing everyone down! My intent was actually just to say "yay, it's September!" and I got lost in something that had been on my mind from a couple months back. Haha! Okay, clearing some tears from my eyes here. Geesh. I guess this is what happens when you have some thoughts you kind of want to verbalize, and then you go get your own blog! Please though, take it from me...if it's not life threatening, just enjoy your days the absolute most you can. Flip that calendar and say today is a new day, a new month, a new start. I hope you all have the best September ever! Random thoughts next week so you don't all think I've gone completely crazy!
Well, I was just thinking this morning about how everything lately seems to be going well for us. I was out on a jog with my daughter in her stroller. It felt different because it was cooler and the change felt nice. We are on an up swing, you could say. Life is all about change. Good days, bad days, good moods, bad moods. How often we have the power to make life whatever we want, but we can just get stuck in a rut. I can be such a homebody at times, but when I start to feel blah, it's good to shake things up. My daughter and I just started a new weekly Community Bible Study, which I think is going to be good for us both. I took a two hour long Zumba class last night. I haven't taken a dance class like that since I was in college. I didn't feel guilty it was during dinner time either because of the new set-up I have with my friend. Our new weekly dinner swap had dinner taken care of. My husband got extra time for a daddy/daughter dinner, and mommy got time to go do my own thing. We have family coming to visit this weekend. I do not want to jinx myself, but all is well right now.
I also got to thinking how a couple months ago when I was lying in a hospital bed...I just wanted to have the freedom to go and do these things. We can all take so much for granted until we don't have the option to do so. I realize life isn't always completely a go-make-it-what-you-want-it scenario. Obviously, some things we cannot change. We may be sick in a hospital bed, have family members sick, have sad situations, or financial troubles. We may be in a stage where we are not getting enough sleep from any of the frustrating things I just mentioned, or even from something good like the blessing of a baby or young child. They too can rob us of our sleep and zap our energy.
I get a little lost in my thoughts here because I am reflecting more upon my own life, and not directing this at anyone in particular who may read this. I don't mean to sound like I'm giving a sermon or something. We all go through certain stages and problems. It's just life can really swing back and forth. I know when I was in that hospital bed I almost felt as though everyone should have a picture of what I was looking at somewhere framed in their house. Just to give perspective. I have it mentally in my mind. If you are in a stage where you can't change certain things, I hope you find the strength to get through them and remain as positive as possible. When you get through that difficult time, you will be able to enjoy things so much more, so please hang on to that thought. And if all you need for a good change...is a change of perspective or attitude, or a new routine, then by all means...do that for yourself. Life is too short.
Man, deep thoughts again today. Hope I'm not bringing everyone down! My intent was actually just to say "yay, it's September!" and I got lost in something that had been on my mind from a couple months back. Haha! Okay, clearing some tears from my eyes here. Geesh. I guess this is what happens when you have some thoughts you kind of want to verbalize, and then you go get your own blog! Please though, take it from me...if it's not life threatening, just enjoy your days the absolute most you can. Flip that calendar and say today is a new day, a new month, a new start. I hope you all have the best September ever! Random thoughts next week so you don't all think I've gone completely crazy!
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Thoughts for Thursday
Deep thoughts, random thoughts...just some thoughts for Thursday.
Some benefits to drinking tea as found on eatdrinkbetter.com:
- Contains antioxidants.
- Can lower stress hormone levels.
- Fights cavities and reduces plaque.
- Keeps you hydrated.
- May reduce the risk of stroke and heart attack.
- Can help lower blood pressure.
- Aids your body in digestion.
- May help prevent diabetes.
- Can help beat bacteria.
- Aids your immune defenses.
Some benefits to drinking coffee as found in an article here on HubPages:
- Antioxidant Rich
- Magnesium Rich
- Anti Bacterial and Anti Adhesive Qualities
- Promotes Digestion
- Improves Athletic Endurance and Performance
- Decreases Depression
- Decreases Your Chance of Developing Parkinson's Disease
- Decreases you Risk of Developing Colon Cancer
- Offsets the Damaging Effects of Smoking
- Treats Asthma and Headaches
- Reduces Your Risks of Liver Disease
Seriously, these are just two sources of a bazillion sites out there either boasting of reasons to drink tea or coffee. Team Tea has reasons against Team Coffee, and vice versa. At the site, The Color of Tea.com, they compare both and at least conclude it can just come down to preference.
I think I am just relieved that coffee isn't all that worse than tea. I did learn from most sites that there are four basic types of tea and that I have always pronounced one wrong. There's white, green, oolong (which is wu long), and black. So where does Earl Grey fit in? I have had my fill on researching tea for the day. Maybe I will pick up some tea the next time I'm at the store and give'em a try. Right now I'm going to wrap up this post and go refill my coffee. :)
I think I am just relieved that coffee isn't all that worse than tea. I did learn from most sites that there are four basic types of tea and that I have always pronounced one wrong. There's white, green, oolong (which is wu long), and black. So where does Earl Grey fit in? I have had my fill on researching tea for the day. Maybe I will pick up some tea the next time I'm at the store and give'em a try. Right now I'm going to wrap up this post and go refill my coffee. :)
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Thoughts for Thursday
Deep thoughts, random thoughts...just some thoughts for Thursday.
This year has been pretty crazy for our family. For the most part, an outsider looking in would think we've got everything working for us. However, this just hasn't been the case. Overall, we are well and we have battled the storms, but we are looking forward to the hard parts of 2011 being behind us. Hmm...battled the storms. So I guess today's "Thoughts for Thursday" is leaning more towards deep thoughts. On another Thursday, I am sure you will find me dishing about the Kardashians or something, but today I can't help but want to touch upon heavier subjects.
So many of our friends have been so kind and supportive through many of the downs of this year. The major downfalls have been the passing of Chad's father, Chad dealing with vestibular issues affecting his own health and work, us experiencing a miscarriage, and the health problems I had that were involved in that experience. There have been smaller issues too, but those were the big ones. I do not like to complain, and I get annoyed when people play the "I've got it harder" card. All I mean by this, is that I know we all have problems and hard issues, so I by no means think we are the only ones with problems.
Anyways, we are hanging in there and things are looking up. All the sad stuff was really completely out of our control. I feel that what we could control was our attitudes, and thankfully they are in check. It's hard for me to put into words some of my thoughts on all these events. I can say that my health is completely back, and Chad is doing better too.
I won't bore you with a ton of details, but I have had a lot of people ask if I am feeling better. I most definitely am. Both physically...which pretty much came back after my last IV was taken out...and emotionally, although I can still have my moments. I have found that not a lot of people talk about having a miscarriage, but a lot of people have experienced them. I now know how difficult they can be and how different everyone copes with them. I was looking for a reason as to "why" it occurred even though I know that cannot be answered. I know the miscarriage occurred due to an infection caused by a virus. I know I was sick due to bacteria in my bloodstream from the infection. Yet, I felt there was a deeper reason of "why" this happened to me and I wanted to know what it was.
Along with losing our son, my health was drastically threatened as well. My body was in bad shape. My organs were all swollen to where I couldn't move, and I had pneumonia in both lungs so I was put on oxygen to help me breathe. Before they figured out what was going on with me, I was told by two doctors that what I had may be fatal. That is something that grabs your attention and gets you reflecting about things. At least for me, that was the aftermath thought process. In the moment, I was more focused on the fact they said it just may be fatal, not that it was fatal. So while I was thankful to be alive after the whole ordeal, I was trying to figure out how I was suppose to grieve and how I should now see my life. I was looking for answers and a good friend told me that "it's just life". She did not say it in an insensitive manner at all, but just plain spoken with some sympathy added in. I think those three words summed it up a lot, but I still can't just brush things off. What we went through was major for us, and it was very real.
My deep thoughts are rambling now and I am wondering if I will actually post this. I did write up my experience in more detail once and decided against sharing it. This all just happened two months ago. Mainly... I have just taken time to heal. I've allowed every emotion and just taken it day by day. I have felt sorry for myself, and felt extremely grateful to be alive. I have cried my eyes out, and looked at my husband and daughter through tears of happiness. I have hugged my family members and friends, and I even snapped at a good friend for no good reason. I traveled to see family, and had family come to visit. I have spent time with others, and I have spent time alone. I have read books, watched movies, gone on walks, and tried new things. I recently painted, took a zumba class, rode a mechanical bull, and now just spilled my thoughts on a blog I started back up. Basically, I have just been living......it is just life, and thankfully life is good.
So many of our friends have been so kind and supportive through many of the downs of this year. The major downfalls have been the passing of Chad's father, Chad dealing with vestibular issues affecting his own health and work, us experiencing a miscarriage, and the health problems I had that were involved in that experience. There have been smaller issues too, but those were the big ones. I do not like to complain, and I get annoyed when people play the "I've got it harder" card. All I mean by this, is that I know we all have problems and hard issues, so I by no means think we are the only ones with problems.
Anyways, we are hanging in there and things are looking up. All the sad stuff was really completely out of our control. I feel that what we could control was our attitudes, and thankfully they are in check. It's hard for me to put into words some of my thoughts on all these events. I can say that my health is completely back, and Chad is doing better too.
I won't bore you with a ton of details, but I have had a lot of people ask if I am feeling better. I most definitely am. Both physically...which pretty much came back after my last IV was taken out...and emotionally, although I can still have my moments. I have found that not a lot of people talk about having a miscarriage, but a lot of people have experienced them. I now know how difficult they can be and how different everyone copes with them. I was looking for a reason as to "why" it occurred even though I know that cannot be answered. I know the miscarriage occurred due to an infection caused by a virus. I know I was sick due to bacteria in my bloodstream from the infection. Yet, I felt there was a deeper reason of "why" this happened to me and I wanted to know what it was.
Along with losing our son, my health was drastically threatened as well. My body was in bad shape. My organs were all swollen to where I couldn't move, and I had pneumonia in both lungs so I was put on oxygen to help me breathe. Before they figured out what was going on with me, I was told by two doctors that what I had may be fatal. That is something that grabs your attention and gets you reflecting about things. At least for me, that was the aftermath thought process. In the moment, I was more focused on the fact they said it just may be fatal, not that it was fatal. So while I was thankful to be alive after the whole ordeal, I was trying to figure out how I was suppose to grieve and how I should now see my life. I was looking for answers and a good friend told me that "it's just life". She did not say it in an insensitive manner at all, but just plain spoken with some sympathy added in. I think those three words summed it up a lot, but I still can't just brush things off. What we went through was major for us, and it was very real.
My deep thoughts are rambling now and I am wondering if I will actually post this. I did write up my experience in more detail once and decided against sharing it. This all just happened two months ago. Mainly... I have just taken time to heal. I've allowed every emotion and just taken it day by day. I have felt sorry for myself, and felt extremely grateful to be alive. I have cried my eyes out, and looked at my husband and daughter through tears of happiness. I have hugged my family members and friends, and I even snapped at a good friend for no good reason. I traveled to see family, and had family come to visit. I have spent time with others, and I have spent time alone. I have read books, watched movies, gone on walks, and tried new things. I recently painted, took a zumba class, rode a mechanical bull, and now just spilled my thoughts on a blog I started back up. Basically, I have just been living......it is just life, and thankfully life is good.
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